good morning world ~ it’s been ages since i’ve seen the world this early …

All hail world ~

Yes I know I’m up rather early in the morning. In fact, it is super EARLY for me, since knowing me, 8am is a rather unholy time for me to be up!

Have been having trouble sleeping lately. And I got so irritated at tossing around in my bed, waking up every one hour only to realise it is still early, that I just decided to wake up. Tell me what should I do to have a good night’s sleep? Hmm …

Okay that’s all for now. I might blog again later. I might not. I’m really bored now, so I’ll try and figure out something to do. If not I might just try and go back to sleep.

zZz …

I’ve gotta feeling, that tonight’s gonna be a good night, that tonight’s gonna be good night, that tonight’s gonna be a good good night ~

I wonder if I just keep singing it over and over again, is tonight gonna be a good night?

Yea, I don’t even know why I feel emo tonight. Though the good thing’s I have no more tears left to cry. (so I won’t have puffy eyes tomorrow) I spent it while watching Departures. (It’s a good show, so go watch it if you haven’t.)

I miss you ~

i will not let my heart break no more

This is what I’m going to be doing this week. All planned out nicely …

Monday: Work
Tuesday: Stay home to draw, go for Jap class at night …
Wednesday: Dating with dearest Sock Ching @ Orchard. Maybe dinner with NanXiao and Delia and SockChing altogether.
Thursday: Free to stay home to draw my orders/ FREE TO DATE!
Friday: Out with Delia and NanXiao to BUGIS. Bugis Street shopping spree?
Saturday: Free to date! / Draw my pending new orders …
Sunday: STAY HOME TO REST!

So officially I have 2 days which I’m free to be dated! Which I also do not mind staying home. But yea, so if you want to date me, it’s this week, next week, and the following week (but I might be preparing for school already)

So till then ~

I’ve concluded, we belong in 2 different world. I should stop here before I let my heart break.

hot & cold

1st of all …

HAPPY NATIONAL DAY SINGAPORE!

I know I’m abit late since it is already past midnight, but I don’t really care.

Today was a tiring day going out. 1st off going out with my new pair of heels almost killed my feet. RAWR! I ended up buying this pair of shoes I eyed on Friday. It is really pretty.

So lunch was too full with Delia and NanXiao at Pizza Hut. Then Delia ditched us for … so NanXiao and I walked around and shopped. Before we decided to catch the fireworks but failed since the place so so effing crowded. Not to mention we ain’t BIG fans of crowds. So we head from one place to another to find a spot to watch, but we end up deciding to go home. So wu liao … I know.

Now my feet are almost dead with the effort needed to walk in those heels. I may never wear them again unless I go to the movies and require little amount of walking. Or I’m armed with boxes of plasters to prevent the shoes from scratching my feet. And I’m so not looking forward to going to work tomorrow. I know like why the hell did I even signed up for work? It is supposed to be a HOLIDAY! But well I didn’t notice when I sign up. And this small job can earn me back the money for my new pair of shoes. So yea, why not?

I’ll just end here, cause it is getting late and I feel shagged.

Cuz u’re hot & u’re cold, I think u feel the same way as me. I believe u have no idea how u feel for me, like how I don’t know what I feel for u.

your way of making me smile ~

Guess what I’ve been done stuck at home all day?

Drawing. I’ve gain sufficient number of orders to keep me drawing constantly. So far this week I’ve earned around about a hundred bucks to and hopefully the orders will continue to grow. I would love to make use of the last month before my school starts to earn a little more extra income for my allowanance. I have a pending fifty bucks worth of orders which I’m waiting for the cash to come in. So I think my earning is rather decent. It may not be terrific, but well unless I really want to have no life and stay home all day rushing out my orders, I wouldn’t want to earn THAT much.

Since school has or is about to start for many, I’m stuck at home with nothing much to do except wait for people to be free so that we can go out. Alternatively staying at home, not spending money, and earning more money from drawing may seem like a good idea. Except I’m home so much that my computer / study table is becoming quite scary rather than comforting to me now.

Seriously, I think I need to stop waiting for people to ask me out. (A habit or something I’m just used to) I rarely bother to date people. Or that arranging a WJSC outing which is like barely once in 2 months? I need to start getting bothered to ask people to go out or I’ll really end up rotting at home even more.

This.Is.Killing.Me.

you’re my drug, my addiction, my ecstasy

Once again, I typed out a whole load of my mundane life. But I deleted the whole chunk cause after a while I felt it was too mundane to continue typing.

School’s started for Delia Tay and Chew Wei Ting. It’s be starting next week after the National Day holiday for the rest of my friends.

My school only starts on the 31st of August. So people, even if you’re like busy with school, don’t forget to ask me out once in a while or I’ll be rotting at home till the end of the month …

This staying at home all day is killing me. I need to get out and have a life. People who see this, feel free to drag me out. I’m become introverted with my constant staying at home.

My life … wait … do I even have a life. =.=

…

All hail world

I know I’ve been missing for a very long time. Another 9 more days and I would have disappeared from the world of blogging for a good month.

Sorry to ANYONE at all who actually even checks back once in a while to see if there are any new post. Your effort has paid off and THANK YOU for your constant support. Sorry for the past month of not blogging. I had ISSUES.

But now I have 5 good thing to be glab about:

1. I have finished and sent out my appeal to SMU. (last night. hurray! it’s a huge load off my shoulders)
2. I’m going to catch Night at the Museum 2 later with Clementine. (finally! i know. and it is a comedy, bound to make me happy)
3. Shopping trip tomorrow with Clementine! (what more can a girl ask for?)
4. I’ve FINALLY gotten my red highlights. (which are not exactly what I wanted, but at least they look good)
5. Don bought me a CHEAP but BIG present back from CHINA. (yay present! I didn’t except him to even bother)

So now the preview of my red hair for those who have not seen it before. Well practically no one has seen it before except for Delia Tay, Wang Nan Xiao, Clementine Chang and some people at work. Seriously it doesn’t look as good as the pictures. It isn’t as obvious. Which was what I wanted. I wanted something bright and striking. Though even with this hair Ah Bee said I look Ah Lian. >.<

Okay PICTURES! With my GREEN eyes too.

side view

see i clipped up my black hair to make the red look more obvious

Okay I’ll blog again soon. I seriously need a new camera. Or at least new batteries for my lousy old camera. Till next time. Which I will not know when it will be.

Have I mentioned that I love Ice Lemon Tea?

I never notice the number of Season’s Ice Lemon Tea bottles lying around the house until now. (My family don’t have a habit of throwing away bottles, and this I must stress, is not gross, cause we actually keep them so they can be sent off to be recycled) And if I have not mentioned, ALL these Ice Lemon Tea bottles are contributed by ME especially when CHEERS! has this sale for Season’s Ice Lemon Tea to be only $1 !!! Not forgetting 7eleven‘s sale of 2 bottles of Season’s Ice Lemon Tea for $2!

Oh, and I just finished reading a book (which Bryce totally thinks it is boring, but Clementine is doing much better than me cause I think she is already on her way to start on her third) and it has totally made me want to start blogging again.

And did I mention my burning desire and urge to go shopping … for SHOES? Except one thing, I.Am.Broke. Though that doesn’t cure my burning and now flaming want to get new shoes, which I totally NEED!

For some reason, shoes have not been my best friend lately. They either have straps snap on me, or have their soles become really slippery (somehow this shoe of mine has its sole worn out and I realise it has a metal base which isn’t good for grip). And all these happening within less a a year of purchase. (The former being 5 months and the latter, 2) Not to mention that I have a great affinity with incompatible shoes with my feet, many of which causing blisters and sores after a couple of hours of wearing them.

HOWEVER! That still doesn’t make me NOT want to go shopping for shoes. As a matter of fact, it just urge me MORE to find that PERFECT shoe for my feet. My latest craze is wedges! Nice cloth floral prints or another nice prints wedges which are strappy and ties up to your ankles and leg. Only that I barely see those kind in wonderful Singapore. And I still want to get boots and heels (even though I know I would barely even wear them). If only I were rich! I could own Charles and Keith, WAIT I don’t even like Charles and Keith, in fact I find them completely incompatible with my feet. But money would still do me good. I can buy shoes! >.<

Okay I guess I’m out of motivation to continue my ramblings. That’s how the book can last me in wanting to blog. Not that I particularly like Meg Cabot’s style of writing anyway. It is just entertaining. But it presses me to get my butt down to the library to collect my reserved book anyway.

So that’s all for now. Will be back if the monster inside of me is raging to come out of its shell.

~ さよなら

give me strength to run on forever …

I feel a burning desire to blog, but when I come online I find myself at a loss of words.

I spent my whole day with my nose in a book, which turned out to be a lovely book. (Did I mention that Jennifer Cruise wrote it? She writes great books) Though the book caused me to think about a lot of things in my life too…

I really wish I could write as freely as I did in the past. The words just came, I didn’t have to worry about this and that and everything that was wrong and everything that was right. Writing has became a chore to me. I no longer can just write what I feel like anymore. I’m just to ashamed of how I feel inside.

I want to draw. I really want to go back to the past and draw. To draw just for the sake of drawing. To draw out of nothing, to be able to just draw freely. Now I still have the urge to draw, but I can think of nothing to draw. In the end, I never draw anything at all anymore. Drawing, art, something I enjoyed, now only one to long for.

Maybe I’ve forgotten a lot of things as I grow up. How to just act myself without a care about how people think of me. In fact I believe I care less now than my sec sch days, but I will never be the same as when I was merely a kid, running wild and free, without a care in the world. Those where the young and carefree days. Days I don’t even remember. Days that were merely history.

This same feeling is haunting me now. The feeling of confusion, pain, sadness, the desire to cry. Because only crying and make this feeling go away. But I cannot cry, for not tears will come to my eyes.

Perhaps I’ve been alone for far too long now. I thrive in company. Despite my love of being alone most of the time, I do need company to become whole again.

Damn! Blame it on me being broke and unable to go out and enjoy. But what is enjoying? Whenever I go out and “enjoy” it involves spending money. What happened to old fashion spending time with just with each others’ company? Then again, in Singapore, what else can you do other than the Movies, Eat, and other activities that involve spending money?

Give me strength …
Perhaps I’ve been alone for too long. I’ve been alone for 3 years now. Perhaps I just long for someone to lean on. Someone who understands me. Someone to be there for me. Like in those storybooks. In particular, Jennifer Cruise’s romance novels.

Addicted to melancholy sad love songs

Its been a while since I blogged. Life has been boring. I can’t help having no life when I’m utterly BROKE. My funds are going to be sucked dry soon.

So people if you have any part time jobs, do contact me. I’m looking for a flexible job, like around 3 – 4 days a week (preferably weekdays), with reasonable pay, and is located in the east or town. Haha as if these kind of jobs come around so easily.

I have no jobs for the next whole week, so I guess I will be rotting at home most of the time trying not to spend any $$$.

And my whole blog post is complaining about me being broke. How interesting and entertaining is that?

Maybe … just maybe … there is a small spark in my heart… a slight tingling feeling … maybe … just maybe.

Bestow upon me the gift of laughter and smiles

Life has been blah for me lately.

For the past week, I had been working at Singapore Conference Hall for the SYF Central Judging for concert bands. People who envy my job as I am able to enjoy the whole Central Judging hearing good bands, think again. I’ve heard countless of bronze, silver and a handful of COP bands. Not forgetting to mention that I have to stand. Well, I’m only in it for the cash and for next Monday to see TK Band in action.

Work has been a great distraction for my troubles. I have countless of laughter and smiles with my colleague at work, but whatever it is, my worries will never truly disappear. After hearing the fact that SMU SOSS is interview over 800 students for the merely 130 places, my worries get worse and my hopes diminised into the darkess.

What’s troubling my life …

1. Food
I’m itching to munch on food all the time. Maybe it’s cause I’m moody and food makes me happy. There goes my plan of trying to lose weight, which I never really even started in the 1st place.

2. US Uni Application
Too much on my mind to go through it all. I’m afraid of the negative to happen, but I’m also afraid the positive would happen and moving over to a new life. But obviously the former is the one I’m more worried about.

3. Local Uni Application
So far I have good feelings for SMU. And SIM (which is too EX). I don’t really have a good feeling from NUS. And I don’t want history to repeat itself. TJC … I went to the open house and knew I didn’t like it straightaway. Guess what? I still don’t.

4. Friends
Something I don’t want to elaborate. Clem know. Fullstop!

5. Crying
I have not cried since I took my results. But I’m having immense underlying stress (which I don’t exactly show since Clem claims that I’m dealing with everything rather well). You know the kind of feeling that you feel, that you want to cry, but somehow your eyes just remind dry? That’s what I’m feeling now.

I don’t really feel like blogging anyway. But last request to people …

I’m looking for a super part time job that is like max 3 – 4 times a week. Preferably area is EAST or TOWN. If you have any offers, do tell me. Leave me a comment or SMS me if you have. I’m lazy to work full time, but I need some income to support myself and my useless shopping. I’m not really in the mood to draw much, so my blog is kind of frozen for the moment.

I wish the world would just shut up and leave me alone for a just a while

Don’t mind my title. It may sound like I’m depressed but no I’m not.

My results may not be anywhere near good, but I am just thankful for not failing.

So here are MY results:

AABBCDE

Not that the 2 As are Project Work and Mother Tongue. So I got no As for any other subjects.

And yes it is according to my 3 H2s, 1 H1 and then followed by my General Paper.

As for my title … I really want people to stop asking what I want to do with my life, what are my plans and giving me advise about the course I should take.

I just need time alone to think about my life.

Congras to those who did well. But respect the fact that I need MORE time than you to think about the options in life.

What I am ENJOYING now! :)

BE JEALOUS!

HOROSCOPE TRUTH?! o.O

VIRGO – You may start the day feeling totally exhausted. It will be more satisfying to see friends in small groups or one-on-one situations.